engine driver

any way to procrastinate says i. the last couple of weeks have been pretty killer with my research paper, seminar website, and counseling video all do a week apart. i finished the paper last wednesday which was really the only stressful assignment out of the three. i pulled an all-nighter outside of starbucks, which thinking about it now, wasn't too bad. a little chilly, but certainly interesting seeing what goes on between 11pm to 5am. i've just finished my counseling video today. that was a bitch because i waited until the last minute to finish it up. gotta thank my friend, robert, for all the help this pass few weeks. without him, i would have been totally fucked... and not in a good way either.

now, i'm working on my seminar website, but i've lost all motivation to do so. i have three more sections to write up and i think i'm just about ready to close up shop. *sigh* i'm mentally weary and honestly, how much can one person bullshit anyway?

i'm currently listening to this band called, the decemberists. i'm not sure if it's because pop music is sucking like it has been for the past decade or if they are really that good. issues.

here's the lyrics to my favorite song from them so far, "the engine driver."

I'm an engine driver
On a long run, on a long run
Would I work beside her
She's a long one, such a long one

And if you don't love me let me go
And if you don't love me let me go

I'm a country lineman
On a high line, on a high line
So will be my grandson
There are powerlines in our bloodlines

And if you don't love me let me go
And if you don't love me let me go

And I am a writer, writer of fictions
I am the heart that you call home
And I've written pages upon pages
Trying to rid you from my bones
My bones
My bones

I'm a money lender
I have fortunes upon fortunes
Take my hand for tender
I am tortured, ever tortured

And if you don't love me let me go
And if you don't love me let me go

And I am a writer, writer of fictions
I am the heart that you call home
And I've written pages upon pages
Trying to rid you from my bones
I am a writer, I am all that you have home
Home
And I've written pages upon pages
Trying to rid you from my bones
My bones
My bones

(And if you don't love me let me go)
And if you don't love me let me go
(And if you don't love me let me go)
And if you don't love me let me go

another great song i'm listening to is "til i hear from you" by the gin blossom. that song reminds of my college years and how i was a total loser when it came to women. not saying that i've gotten better, but hey, i'm married ain't i?

oh, and "the drugs don't work" by the verve is another good song especially driving home from starbucks at night. i don't know what it's about really, but it definitely reminds me of dad.

All this talk of getting old
It's getting me down my love
Like a cat in a bag, waiting to drown
This time I'm coming down

And I hope you're thinking of me
As you lay down on your side
Now the drugs don't work
They just make you worse
But I know I'll see you face again

Now the drugs don't work
They just make you worse
But I know I'll see you face again.

But I know I'm on a losing streak
'Cause I passed down my old street
And if you wanna show, then just let me know
And I'll sing in your ear again

Now the drugs don't work
They just make you worse
But I know I'll see your face again

'Cause baby, ooh, if heaven calls, I'm coming, too
Just like you said, you leave my life, I'm better off dead

All this talk of getting old
It's getting me down my love
Like a cat in a bag, waiting to drown
This time I'm coming down

Now the drugs don't work
They just make you worse
But I know I'll see your face again

'Cause baby, ooh, if heaven calls, I'm coming, too
Just like you said, you leave my life, I'm better off dead

But if you wanna show, just let me know
And I'll sing in your ears again

Now the drugs don't work
They just make you worse
But I know I'll see your face again

Yeah, I know I'll see your face again
Yeah, I know I'll see your face again
Yeah, I know I'll see your face again
Yeah, I know I'll see your face again

I'm never going down, I'm never coming down
No more, no more, no more, no more, no more
I'm never coming down, I'm never going down
No more, no more, no more, no more, no more (repeat to fade)

so there, i've procrastinated even further... motivation is a deadly incentive.